It's been a while...quick update

Wow, it has been a while since I posted on here, things have been a bit crazy, we have had so much going on.  It might be a while between posts until after Christmas and things settle down in my house.  I guess it is time to catch everyone up on what has been going on.

Our ladies in our ministry have really been stepping up and helping me with everything I have had going on, they have sorted clothes for our homeless outreach (some not so appealing, long story and I was sworn to secrecy), and had a lot of fun in the process.  We sorted through so many clothes that it started to turn some people (who shall remain nameless) a little crazy

  

Just me and my girls, having some serious fun.

That was before our canned food and toy drive.  The ladies of our ministry stepped up and combined with a few teenagers (and some of my kids) and spent two days in the cold collecting canned food, unwrapped toys and any donations for our Angel Tree party that people wanted to give.  All in all we did great!  We raised $300 in cash, two tables full of canned food and about 20 toys for our kids that we adopt.  If anyone would like to donate or learn more about Angel Tree check it out.

We had such a great time collecting things and I am so proud of what we were able to accomplish!  While at Walmart we had a guy walk by that we stopped and told him what we were doing, and he went into Walmart and when he came back out, he stopped by us and unloaded 6 bags, 3 of name brand toys (Disney Barbies and Hot Wheels) and 3 of name brand canned food items (Del Monte green beans, corn, Ocean Spray cranberry sauce) and put the cart away, he didn't have anything for himself.  That was the greatest experience out there.

This weekend we did a homeless outreach at Unity Park in Ft. Worth, this was our second time out there in a month.  We combined with Shilo Cowboy Church, Victory Family Church and Venus Key Club.  We went for the first time and had such a great experience that we had to come back again.  There are so many pics that it would take forever to post them all on here.  They are all on our ministry page www.facebook.com/noturningbackministry. 

Like I said so much has been going on and so much is getting ready to take place with our Angel Tree party, Christmas on the Square and all of our other Christmas things that are going on that I will try to post as often as I can.  Just thought I would pop in for a quick post!  Thanks everyone for getting me to 427 reads!!  You guys know you can follow me too right?  Can sign up using facebook to make it easier, I like having followers :)

My friend Dan Dugan

We just got a call today about a good friend of ours who had suddenly passed away.  We are still in shock, not quite sure about anything because all we know is that he passed away on Monday at his daughters house.  I am just glad he was at his daughters house, he loved his daughter so much.  I have never met her, but I feel like I know her.  My girls are going to miss him, they called him Uncle Dan, he always chewed on Ella's neck (she loved him so much), he brought suckers and tootsie rolls for Sierra, (she looks for him every week, she even likes to pretend that she doesn't like him just so he will chase her down and love on her).

Dan had such a gentle spirit about him, anytime you would ask him what was going on, he would always without fail say "Jesus!  Jesus is what is going on, do you know Jesus?"  There is no doubt in my mind that Dan is in glory with Jesus laughing and singing one of his many songs that he wrote for Him.  It just isn't going to be the same without him, it never is.  He was always the first to pray with or for someone, was never ashamed to lay hands on someone wherever he was at at the time.  I never heard him say anything negative about anyone ever.  He always had a smile and was one of the most postive persons I have ever known in my life.  He loved everyone, and he loved Jesus like none other. 

We met Dan about a year ago or so, we were doing a commercial on a local radio station and he heard it and came to check us out...and never left.  He became a permanent fixture at our support group and signed up for just about everything we had.  He had his own ministry, he published books with his amazing testimony in it, he had a couple of CDs out, and was huge on personal healing. 

I remember the last conversation I had with Dan.  I was telling him about my grandpa, that I was sad because he wasn't doing very well when I left him in San Antonio.  I told him that I know that he was ready to go, but I was selfish and I wanted to keep him for myself.  Dan told me that if he is ready to go, let him go.  I will see him again, and when God is ready to take him, or me or anyone, He is going to take them.  He gave me a big ol' Dan hug and said he would see me next week.  I sure will miss that old man.  I know that he is in a much better place, but I am selfish, I wasn't ready for him to go, I still had more of his stories to hear (even though he told the same ones quite often, mostly about his daughter and how much Ella looked and acted like her), more of his songs to listen to and learn, more ministry work to do with him, but I guess God decided he was ready for him, and so he did.

Dan, I sure will miss you and your great big smile.  I'm making mince meat pies for you next week, was already going to make them for Tuesday, but now I am dedicating them to you.

Christ For the Nations

Tonight we took our youth group to Christ For the Nations.  It was awesome!!  For those of you who don't know, Christ For the Nations is a bible college in Dallas.  They offer something called Tuesday Night Experience, they open the college for anyone who wants to come and listen to amazing worship music (a lot of the music graduates end up with awesome music careers in the Christian music industry), and awesome guest speakers who always give such a new look on things.

Tonight the guest speaker was from San Antonio, his name was Warren Beamer.  He had long hair, was originally from Lousiana, and was cracking jokes.  It was so nice to hear him talk about Jesus like he was his best friend. He was telling us about Luke 14:11, the story of the 10 lepers. Anyone who doesn't know this story, here is my paraphrase of the story.  Jesus is on the road and comes upon 10 men with leperacy.  They see Jesus and ask him to heal their leperacy, and He does, when He heals them He tells them to go tell the priest that they have been healed, so they run off to tell the priest, and one turns back and goes to Jesus and drops to the ground and hugs Jesus' feet and thanks him for healing him.  Jesus asks him "weren't there 10 of you?  Where did the other 9 go? Your faith has healed you."  And the man with leperacy goes and is completely healed.

Pastor Warren was explaining what the process of looking for leperacy was, how the doctors were more concerned with a small spot than someone who had a large spot becuase the large spot was the effect of your body fighting off the infection, and the person with the large spot knew that they were infected, they were very concerned with the person with the smallest spot because on the inside it was huge.  The same way that sin is in our lives, the person with the small sin doesn't think that they really need any help because it is something small, and they don't realize that there is anything festering inside their soul, and the person who is the addict, the prostitute, the alcoholic who sees that they have a problem that is huge realizes that they need the help.  It really hit home with a lot of the kids in our group who have come from homes with people who have the huge sin and realize they need the help.  He went on to explain that Jesus stopped what he was doing to heal 10 lepers.  If he would stop what he is doing to heal 10 people who have leperacy, why wouldn't he stop to help you?

I wish I could remember everything that was said, and if I can find the video online I will post it because it was an awesome message that hit home with a lot of our youth, and with some of the adults that went with us as well.  Hopefully some people took some of this home with them and will really put some thought into what was being said and how it effects their lives in a major way.

Church and bedtime...

Well today was the first time in a while that we went to church.  Jimmy and I got up early, got ready and rode the bike to visit a local church.  We don't have a church home which will shock a lot of you, our church home is the prison, and our support group.  We have church wherever God leads us to have church at the time, if it is at our kitchen table, so be it, if it is a group on Tuesday nights, ok no problem, and it always always always happens at the prison on Fridays and the 2nd saturday of every single month without fail for the last 5 years.  So while we don't have a "Church home" we have many church homes that love us and welcome us and are excited to see us every week.  So anyway now that we have that out of the way, we went to church this morning and heard an amazing message about being on fire for the Lord, how to many churches are dying because they have become pew sitters by nature and think that they are serving by doing nothing.  That we need to get out there and do some footwork, how do we expect anyone to get saved if we aren't doing anything to show them what it is like to live as a person who is saved?  Are they just supposed to look at someone sitting in a chair about to fall asleep and think "Whoo-Hoo!!!  I so want some of what they have going on!!!!  Let me go ask them how I can do that too!"  NO!  You have to get out there and start showing people how blessed you are, post it on facebook, tweet about it, put it on myspace (if it is still out there, I have heard a rumor that it is), text about it, scream it from the rooftops.  Let everyone know that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life, he is the only way!  That a life with Him is so amazing and you don't know how you did it before you found Him.  How is anyone supposed to know if you don't tell them and show them the amazing gift you have been given?  Needless to say, this evening, Jimmy and I went out to pass out fliers about our ministry, to let people know about Him and what He is doing in our lives.  We knocked on doors for about 2 hours, handed out fliers, told them about what we were doing (scared one guy, I guess the biker vests were a little to much for him, he wouldn't open the glass screen door).  Some might show up at group this week, some might not.  Either way, we got the word out there and someone who's door we knocked on, God set that up, they needed to hear that there is something out there for them, someone who won't judge what they have done, who loves them for who they are.  There is a group of people out there meeting every week with piercings, tattoos, bikers, cowboys, old, young, some with bad tempers, some that are quiet, some that are loud, some that cuss then blush, some that cuss and then cuss again because they are sorry, but no one judges one another, we just love one another, and we would love to have them join our group if for nothing else, just to check it out (they almost always come back at least a few times, and some we just can't get rid of no matter what we do j/k we love all of our people).

So on to the other thing in the title of tonights post.  Bedtime, yes I know it is an odd combination, church and bedtime, but tonight God just opened my eyes to something huge!  I have said before that I am working on getting the girls to bed on their own, so far they have been doing really good, Ella the past couple of nights has been throwing fits when it comes time to make easy decisions for the night.  She does really good up until she has to decide which blanket she wants to use and if she wants it wrapped around her or if she just wants to be covered.  It is a major meltdown as if I have just told her that she will be wrapped up in fire ants or no chocolate for the rest of her life or something awful like that.  I ask her first which blanket and she just sits there and looks at me as if I am speaking Chinese or something, so I ask her again, "Ella, which blanket do you want to use tonight?  Poka dots or the red one?"  Last night she decided she was going to choose something that wasn't one of the two choices just to see if I was paying attention, and of course it would be the one that Sierra was using.  That ended up being a 10 minute tantrum.  So tonight I asked her 3 times, she just looked at me so I said, "ok, you think about it, I am going to go cover Sierra and I will be back to cover you (they are in toddler beds like 4 feet away from one another).  Meltdown 1 starts.  I ignore her, ask Sierra which blanket she wants, she wants her heart one, and she wants it around (which is always more fun because it comes with a snuggle and a bounce/throw onto the bed), hug, kiss, I love you's, sweet dreams and she is done (have I mentioned I love that kid).  Back to Ella, I ask her again which blanket she wants and she just melts down, bawling.  I calmly ask again, "Ella, you need to pick a blanket or I am going to have to pick for you because it is going to get really really cold in your room tonight."  Nothing.  So I tell her, "Ok, I am going to cover you with the red and the poka dot kiss and hug and I am going to go in the living room, I have some things I need to do"  so I cover her, she kicks the blanket off, I cover her again, she kicks it off again.  I cover her, hold it down long enough for me to kiss her on the head, hug her, tell her I love her and good night, out the door.  The child sounds as if she has become posessed!!!  Kicking and screaming, who is this kid and what has she done with my sweet Ella who loves to sit on the couch with me and rub my hair and tell me how much she loves me?!  So heartbroken I sit in the livingroom (right next to their room) and try to get lost in facebook (zombies, smurfs and sims), but I just can't get into it.  I wait a few minutes in hopes she will calm down and go back in, ask her again, "would you like to pick a blanket?  I will either cover you, or put it around and we can start over again."  Supernanny would have a FIT!!!  But it turns out all she needed was a few minutes to realize I meant business, if she was not going to pick, I would and I would make sure that she still got her hugs and kisses and her I love you's, but I was not going to mess around.  I guess she either learned Chinese or I started speaking English again because she picked the poka dot one, wanted it around and gave the biggest hugs and kisses and told me that she loved me.  My Ella Bella was back.

The reason I told the long verson was because this is how it was revealed to me.  We are Ella, or Sierra.  God tells us, you can either go this way and pick which one, I can love you through it, hug you, kiss you, tell you how much I love you and we can do it peacefully.  Or you can make the decision to choose the third thing, not what I intend for you to do.  But if you do this, it isn't going to go well, you are going to end up kicking and screaming and mad, throwing a fit like a 3 year old, but I will still try to help you make the right decision, still give you a hug and kiss and tell you that no matter how you act, I will always love you.  Once you decide that you have calmed down, you can come to me, and we will find a way to get you back where you need to be, back to the choices that I laid out before you, the ones that I am blessing for you.  We can either work together or against each other, but it is always easier to work together.

I was sitting on the couch after the last time I went in the room, when my Ella was back and I just had one of those ah-ha moments and it was like, "duh!  How have I never gotten that before?!"  Ever have one of those moments?  The ones where you can just hear God talking to you and telling you, "This is what I have been trying to get across to you."